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How VAWA empowers abused men to get green cards: Diego’s story of hope beyond spousal abuse

March 27, 2024
  • Individual Immigration
  • News

By Kasey Husk

When Eagan Immigration client “Diego” first tied the knot with his wife, “Sonia,” in 2015, he believed that all his dreams were coming true. Diego and Sonia had first fallen in love 10 years before when the pair, both immigrants from Peru, were both working at the same fast-food restaurant. In time, circumstances had driven the couple apart and they had separated.

When chance brought them back together in 2013, Diego felt like everything had come together exactly as it was always meant to be. Their wedding day 18 months later was one of the happiest of his life. He believed that he and Sonia would build a beautiful life together, and that Sonia would help him raise his daughter – then still living in Peru – while Diego became a father to Sonia’s young son.

Unfortunately, Sonia soon showed her true colors. As is often the case in abusive relationships, she began to change as soon as she believed her partner was not in a position to leave her. She dropped her loving façade and began frequently comparing Diego unfavorably to her former lover. She stopped contributing to the couple’s joint bank account, demanding instead that Diego support the family almost entirely on his own.

Despite their prior agreement to the contrary, she saw Diego’s money are “their” money but her own earnings as exclusively her own. She became increasingly angry if Diego spent any money on himself. In time, she demanded he stop spending time with his friends – men she inexplicably referred to as “lowlifes” despite them being respectable, employed family men – altogether. He grew increasingly isolated.

Diego’s life was shattered about a year after the couple married, when he was beaten and stabbed during a robbery. He was deeply traumatized by the experience, but Sonia showed no concern whatsoever for his well-being when he returned from the hospital. Her sole concern was that he would miss work and thus not be paid.

Later, when he was robbed a second time, she was unequally unconcerned. She quickly began to mock Diego for his trauma and refused even small accommodations to help him cope. Diego was devastated by his wife’s total lack of empathy.

Sonia’s cruelty even extended to Diego’s young daughter, “Marina.” Early on in their relationship, Sonia expressed a great desire to raise Marina as her own. She even went to see Marina in Peru, since Diego could not, and helped her start the process of getting a green card. After Diego brought Marina to the United States, however, she became demanding and highly critical of the child. She regularly accused the shy 12-year-old of being “stuck up” and implied she was dirty because she was from Peru.

As the couple’s relationship began to fall apart due to her poor treatment of both Diego and Marina, Sonia began threatening to have Diego deported whenever she was angry. While she had previously intended to petition for Diego to gain status in the United States, she had quickly made it clear she no longer wanted to do that. She implied he was useless to her because he was not “man enough” to truly support her financially. Disturbingly, she seemed to relish reminding Diego that if he was deported, Marina would have to go back too.

How Eagan Immigration Helped Diego

For many people in psychologically abusive relationships, it can be difficult to identify when a troubled relationship has become an abusive one. For men who are socially conditioned to push down their feelings of sadness and hurt, it can feel nearly impossible to admit they are being abused. Yet as victims like Diego know, cruel words, financial exploitation or threats may not leave the same bruises and cuts as physical blows, but they often leave victims equally wounded.

Diego came to Eagan Immigration because he was desperate to remain in the United States to care for his daughter. He was terrified that if his soon-to-be ex-wife had him deported, he could not stay in the United States to care for Marina, nor seek psychological care to cope with the twin traumas of his violent attack and abusive relationship. In a consultation with Eagan Immigration, our skilled attorneys determined that Diego was an excellent candidate for an I-360 Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) Self-Petition.

What’s a VAWA Self-Petition? This specific type of immigration petition allows undocumented individuals who are victims are physical, psychological, sexual or financial abuse to seek lawful permanent resident status in the United States based on their relationship to their abuser, without their abuser even knowing they are doing so.

To qualify, the abuser must be one of the following: his or her lawful permanent resident (LPR) or U.S. citizen spouse, his or her adult U.S. citizen child, or his or her LPR or U.S. citizen parent. Importantly, victims like Diego can apply for a VAWA self-petition even if they are divorced from their abuser, as long as they meet two criteria: 1) the divorce was less than two years ago, and 2) the petitioner has not remarried.

So why are they called VAWA self-petitions if men can apply? The Violence Against Women Act of 1994 was intended as a crackdown on domestic violence and sexual assault, and it included numerous provisions to help fund the investigation and prosecution of abusers and provide options for restitution for victims. The bill was so named because while domestic violence can affect either gender, statistically women were (and are) more many times more likely to be victims than men.

In recognition of the fact that abusers in mixed-status families often use their undocumented partner’s status as a way to control them, Congress later elected to expand the Violence Against Women Act to create a special route to legal status for undocumented individuals in abusive relationships. These petitions are thus called “VAWA self-petitions.

Despite to the name, however, the resources and benefits of the Violence Against Women Act, including self-petitions, have always been available abuse victims of all genders. In a speech in praise of the re-authorization of the Violence Against Women Act – a bill jointly sponsored by then Sen. Joe Biden – Senator Harkin notes: “it was not, and is not, the intent of Congress categorically to exclude men who have suffered domestic abuse or sexual assaults from receiving benefits and services under the Violence Against Women Act.”

Diego’s outcome after applying for a VAWA Self-Petition

Eagan’s experienced immigration attorneys helped Diego file his VAWA self-petition in late 2018. By February 2019, he had already received a prima facie determination, which established that, on its face, USCIS believed his petition had merit. By June 2019, Diego received a work permit (EAD) and advanced parole, which allowed him the freedom to travel back to his native Peru without fear that he would not be re-admitted to the United States. By January 2021, Diego’s VAWA self-petition was approved.

Most exciting of all, however, is that Diego became an official lawful permanent resident of the United States in September 2022! In just three and a half more years, he will be eligible to naturalize as a U.S. citizen.

Are you undocumented and in an abusive relationship? When in these situations, it can be easy to lose hope and begin to believe that nothing will ever change. At Eagan Immigration, however, wants you to know that you have options. Diego is just one of many clients Eagan has helping gain the peace of mind that comes from having legal status in the United States. Reach out to an immigration specialist today at 202-709-6439 for a free, confidential phone evaluation.